Healthy relationships shouldn’t take much work. And if they do, it’s time to go our separate ways. We must be compatible. If we need therapy, our relationship is already doomed. My partner is supposed to know what I want, and what I need. Healthy couples never argue, because fighting ruins relationships. Margarita Tartakovsky, M.S. says that this is a misconception. Healthy relationship means arguing, not fighting – and built around support and trust.
There are times that we often feel uncomfortable with our relationship. Perhaps that is due to the tons of issues we currently experience. There are too much drama and toxicity that makes us feel uninterested in patching things up with our significant other. In some unfortunate instances, we somehow think that the only reason why need to stay committed is the years spent with our partner that we don’t want to go to waste.
“If you normally shut down, lash out, or disconnect when strong feelings arise in your relationship, developing the skills of emotion mindfulness can help you to get centered, understand what you’re feeling, and better communicate to your partner about what you need, as well as listen to their needs.” – Ronald Frederick, Ph.D.
But does it bother you to know that maybe the reason why you do not feel comfortable in the relationship anymore is that you are doing things you are not supposed to?
Never Ever Tell A Stranger A Single Issue Both You And Your Partner Are Dealing With
One particular mistake in a relationship that a lot of people tend to ignore is the idea of looking for an outside zone comfort. No, it is not okay to tell a stranger the things that you and your partner are dealing with. Not only it does create a barrier in your communication, but it also allows a third party to come in and engage. If you still do not get it, it is where an unwanted affair starts. Yes, that is a fact. Cheating sometimes doesn’t happen by choice. Some chances are it can start with a simple “hello” from an unknown person. Then, it becomes an unintentional affair.
Never Ever Ask A Friend To Say Things To Your Partner On Your Behalf
If you and your significant other are having an issue, there is no way your friends can take sides. But because they often hear only a side of the story, they start to judge. Honestly, that is okay. You cannot blame them for having a split opinion. But the thing you shouldn’t do is to ask them to speak for you. It is your relationship, and it is your partner. Therefore, it is your responsibility to talk and communicate with your significant other. Your friends must stay away on the issue because their involvement is limited to what you and your partner allow.
Never Ever Agree To Let People Decide For Your Relationship
Honestly, it is okay to ask for suggestions and take in some people’s opinion whenever there is one. However, what is not okay is when you allow people to make a life-changing decision that you know you are uncomfortable doing. Not because a lot of people are telling you to do it; it does not mean it will end well. Note that not all comments are useful, and not all suggestions are applicable in your situation. It is your life and your relationship. You are the one that must decide for it because it is you and your partner that will suffer if all goes tumbling down.
Being in a relationship is an ongoing task. It is not all about spending time together and staying happy. There are complications that you and your partner must take into account. Therefore, do not rush into judging and try evaluating yourself too.
“Falling in love is a wonderful feeling. At the beginning of every relationship, everything is new and fresh. A new face, new voice, new body, and, of course, new sexual energy. The mystery is there.” – Lianne Avila, marriage and couples counselor. It’s just a reminder for you.