According to magnetism, opposite poles repel. On the other hand, an old proverb says that birds of the same feather flock together. Both may be true in their respective fields or whatever you want to refer them to, but I don’t think either will fit in when you’re talking about relationships.
A relationship is something that is more complicated. Couples can at times be like same poles that attract, but at other times do repel. Sometimes, the same feathers flock together, and sometimes they fall apart. One significant factor why that is so is our inconsistent mood. There are days when we’re like riding a roller coaster of emotions.
There are times when you feel up and times when you feel down. Having mood swings is sometimes just usual. Who hasn’t experienced having mood swings? What is not normal is when these mood swings become uncontrollable that it affects our activities of daily living and our relationships with others. There are also times when mood affects your:
• Sleep patterns
• Energy level
• Alcohol or drug use
• Sex drive
“Humans are complex and all of us experience emotions like anger and sadness, so it’s very normal that at some point in the relationship, you will disagree with your partner.” Maryann W. Mathai, LPCC, LMHC, LPC, NCC elaborates. When this happens, mood swings may lead to mania or depression. It’s time to suspect that the mood swings can be due to an undiagnosed mental disorder.
See Your Doctor
Often, the person himself doesn’t realize that he has a mental illness. All that he knows is that he has severe mood swings, uncontrollable anger, and negative feelings. He has never really paid attention to what could be the underlying cause of the rapid mood shifts.
If your mood swings become a threat to you or your partner, don’t you think it’s about time to consider seeing a doctor?
“If emotions become heightened, it’s a good idea to implement a safe word prior to the discussion which indicates that one of the partners needs to take a break,” Michelle Smith, LMHC says. It’s not easy to accept having a mental illness, but once you can talk to the right person, a doctor or therapist, you’ll have a clear mind about the disease. They can explain to you that it is something that is treatable.
Untreated Mental Illness Makes Relationships Complicated
Avoiding treatment and therapy can put your relationship on the rocks. Your relationship that started sweet can end up in a bitter situation. At first your partner may understand you, but eventually, he will get tired and just give up. Better to get treatment and have your fair share of maintaining a better and sweeter relationship rather than a bittersweet one.
Your partner will find you more attractive if she sees you doing your part and trying your best. Not all days are perfect and not every day is good, but when good days come make the most out of it and show your love and affection.
You and your partner may not be of similar poles or the same feather, but you can make your relationship work through effort. Don’t let your rapid mood swings or mental illness get in the way and dictate where the romance should go.
As Jor-El Caraballo, LMHC explains, “Relationships in and of themselves do not create mental illness.” However, he adds, “When we suffer in our relationships, it can be difficult to move forward from past hurt and trauma.” It’s better that you acknowledge that your mood swings are caused by something else, accept and understand that you can get treated and the illness can be controlled, and do something – treatment and therapy – to improve your condition.