If you are a woman who has not gone to the salon for ages to have her hair or nails done, salute!
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If you are a woman who has not gone to the salon for ages to have her hair or nails done, salute!
Finding a partner in life is crucial in determining your wellbeing. It is vital in keeping you healthy, sane, and successful. If you want to have a peaceful and happy life, you better make sure the partner you get is someone that will bring you positivity in life instead of causing you stress or depression.
They say, “Love conquers all,” but does it? How does love work with time apart from each other? Would long-distance relationships last longer than when you are physically together? How do couples make it work when they could not see or touch each other?
An unhealthy relationship can cause too much emotional stress that possibly links to some severe mental illness. It will affect all the areas of your life and turn it upside down. It can damage your social interaction, self-worth, self-confidence, and productivity. That is why psychiatrists tend to explain why it is necessary to understand the need for courage when it’s time to end the marriage.
Being stuck in a relationship that hinders you from developing a confident personality is a sign that you should end the marriage. When one or both of you don’t contribute to the growth of your partner anymore, your marriage tends to get stuck in problematic situations over and over again. Your argument about little things can cause both of your time and effort that will eventually end up wasted. Your marriage will become the definition of difficulties that seem to be unmanageable. You will ultimately feel less appreciated and unloved.
At most times, you will have this struggle in keeping yourself together. You end up ignoring plans and start to go on a different path. It is complicated since married couples should know how to compromise. When you happen to have an honest conversation and realize that a stable future is unrealistic, then it’s time to let go. There is no reason for you to keep yourself strangled by the idea that marriage is always perfect. You need to consider your emotional happiness as well.
Your marriage should have to be the reason for your complete wellbeing. Though it is normal to experience several misunderstandings, it shouldn’t put you in a position that you can no longer function. When you feel the extreme pressure of maintaining your emotional equilibrium and mental responsiveness, then you are not healthy anymore. If you struggle to identify your personality and feel like you’re losing control over yourself, then you need to breakthrough. The shame, guilt, anxiety, and pressure will not only make it impossible for you to keep going, but it’ll also drastically damage your wellbeing in no time.
When you’re marriage is not positively affecting your life, then it’s time for you to pull yourself out. The kind of relationship that hinders you from becoming productive will soon create a different version of yourself. You’ll become more insensitive, paranoid, afraid, depressed, and sometimes suicidal. Your family and friends may also suffer from the stress that your marriage can give you. In severe cases, you may tend to lose your own identity because of the pain and suffering.
You may suffer a lot from those uncomfortable feelings that contribute to damaging effects, but you have to pull yourself and try harder to stay on track. It may take you a while to realize the need for ending a relationship, but factors that continuously damage your emotional and psychological health are enough reason to get out of the situation. Remember that you are supposed to feel loved and not to be dragged down.
Everything Is Not As It Seems
I believed that our life was perfect. We were young, supposedly happy, a great business giving us financial comfort, and our third child was on the way. Everything was just bliss. Nothing could go wrong, or so I thought.
My ex-boyfriend, who is now my husband, even defended me to his tiger mom. We were just 18 when we learned that I was pregnant. All throughout our relationship of two years, his mom and aunts were against us. They were even harassing me and telling me to let go of their “prince,” the heir to their business and family name. He came from a very influential family, and of course, certain things were expected of him. It wasn’t anticipated from him that he would impregnate a regular girl from a typical family – that’s me.
And so, when we learned of the fruit of our love growing inside, we eloped and only returned when his family (mainly his mom) agreed that we get married. Fairytale story, huh? It was at first, but when you are young and forced into a situation that you are not ready for, consequences abound. Our wedding was grand, and the most important people in our city became our godparents.
The Best Wedding Ever
They went all out with our wedding. It was lovely. My gown was made of the most exquisite silk and chiffon from Italy, with Swarovski crystals, of course. It was handmade by the best seamstress in the city and designed the country’s top fashion designer for the celebrities. We held the wedding at a 7-star hotel partly owned by their family, and yes, everything was just faultless.
At 18, we had our own house named after my husband, and a part of their business was given to him as his bread and butter. We were having the time of our lives. Little did I know that our life will be a roller coaster ride times ten.
He Can’t Control It
I won’t sugar coat it anymore. My husband had sex with anyone who came his way and was wearing a skirt. The list included his secretary (such a cliché), half of his clients, some of the mothers of his friends, and believe it or not, our nanny. I think that I tried to satisfy his urges, but I’m not enough, I guess. He had to do it every day, and at least twice a day. With my hands full of work and the kids, how can I fulfill his needs?
The priest said, and I committed to those vows – for better or for worse. He is not a terrible person, but he is at his worst right now. His children adore him to bits, and if he is a stupid man, he won’t give his love, time, and effort for them. It’s just that something is wrong with my husband. He likes mature women and would get turned on by the sight of the – tall, dark-haired, sexy, and powerful, mostly. Just like his mother.
Husband Asked For My Help
Not too long ago he asked me for help. He said he wants to change and I see his remorse. Even if my heart bleeds for his behavior, I compelled myself to help him. We had a discreet meeting with a counselor, and we found out that my husband is a sexual addict, and he may be one of those mother-fixated men.
Right now, he is under therapy for his compulsive behavioral issues, and I am supporting him in all ways possible. We are still married, and I don’t plan on leaving him. I just pray that he gets better, and will learn how to cope with his disorder.
Getting into a relationship is easy. Staying in it is the challenge. In the long run, you will start to realize that it’s not all about the hugs and kisses. Troubles will begin to rise from once small issues surrounding your marriage. Compatibility is an issue no matter how much you deny it. They say “opposites attract.” This statement is believable when you are in high school or early adulthood, but once you reach the age where you are already looking for stability, every detail of a person’s personality is vital, as his priorities and values in life.
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In a relationship, a lot of us believe that what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger. Therefore, the things that hurt us in the slightest of ways get ignored. Perhaps we think that some things are worth to forget and some mistakes require instant forgiveness. But does it have to be like that all the time? Do we entirely need to exert effort to wholeheartedly accept the person who always hurt us without an excuse? I don’t think so. Even the nicest individual in the world will agree that some things need to change for the better.
Love And Prejudice
We often mistake the idea of love for affection. A lot of us believe that when there is this strong connection, we appear obliged to follow a not-so-worthy relationship rule, which is to forgive and forget. However, the problem lies in the consistency of the damage. You see, it is easy to apologize and say sorry. However, it becomes hard to keep making things better after that. As a result, the apology gets overused because mistakes are getting its way back on its line. Then what happens? We begin to tolerate the slips. We begin to have this ideology that perhaps we deserve the things that are currently in front of us. That whatever we do to make things better, it will be useless because the whole thing relates to our idea of love.
The Sad Truth
Second chances appear given to those people who deserve it. However, there is no guarantee to know when a person needs it. Unfortunately, we often look at the brighter side of every mistake of our significant other that we do not consider creating an adjustment to how we should deal with things. We get used to the idea that to save a relationship, we have to allow chances multiple times. We become weak in creating decisions because we only focus on hopes and dreams. That is the problem why we get stuck in an unhealthy relationship. We heed towards change, but we, ourselves, do not try and work on it.
It Is Over
It may sound inconsiderate, but the process of giving multiple chances to an individual who doesn’t know how to use it well is stupidity. Yes, it is not love, neither consideration. It is a stupid gesture that we do we believe that people change once we tell them what we think and how we feel. But no! It merely represents an act of ignorance towards the situation we cannot handle. But do not get me wrong. I do not intend to say that we should not forgive those people who hurt us. We should because that is the only thing that brings us peace. What I am trying to emphasize here is that these people, if they are genuinely concern about us, they will exert an effort never to commit the same mistake over and over again. But if that is not how they see us, then we have to guiltlessly call it quits.